Monday, November 7, 2011

Don't look down...you'll get hit with the basketball

Someone mentioned how most of my blogs fall back on when I was younger. I do it to show a comparison of a change of life...mainly mine. Forms a way to display that certain lessons were learned or gave me wisdom. Lol here goes another one lol...

When I was younger... my sister, brother, and I were playing the game Taps with our basketball infront of our apartment (clearly wasnt a house lol). For those that are unfamiliar with the game, the object of the game is to throw the basket ball to the other person in the circle before letting your feet touch the ground. If you do then you're out. And if you catch the ball with your feet on the ground then you are out. Its a fun game with major need for Stamina lol. So any who, as mentioned in previous blogs, I am epileptic. I've been diagnosed since I was about 4 or 5. Well during our game, I had one so my attention wasn't focused on the ball...my eyes weren't fully alert and I ended up looking downward. WELL my sister threw the ball at me and it hit me in my stomach. When I snapped out of it, I immediately came out of my seizure in pain and saw my sister laughing because she did it on accident. Well some people are aggressive when coming out of a seizure, and that day I clearly was. lol...

NOW getting to the point of my story... I realized when you lose sight of what you are trying to keep up with, you'll end up hurting yourself. Now in my case, I didn't have control of my body. But in many cases, other people allow themselves to get distracted and let the ball hit them when they least expect it and it hurts more than when they were focused on playing the game. What's the difference?? The one that became distracted ends up more vulnerable and so the pain is more severe than the person that was at least paying attention. 

In my recent state, .... i realized that I looked down and the ball hit me in "my stomach" again...but this time... i can't be mad at anyone else but myself....... why?? Cuz first time shame on you but second time shame on me... or 3rd time, or 4th time, or 5th time, etc etc... you get the picture lol...
On a biblical standpoint, My self-observation has recently reminded me that I need to look UP...because the things that surround me won't hurt me so easily. So for right now through my situations...I'm disappointed in myself for losing sight...because I allowed myself to be vulnerable and only hurt myself and hinder my growth with God.

So to conclude, My problem: I'm too worried about my circumstances and recent situations in my life meeting up to how it originally looked like it would be or how it could be. Due to that problem, My expectations are high all the time. If someone tells me something, and it seems they proved something to me... I take their word seriously and let my guard down. If a job looks very promising, I make up in my mind that I got it. If I have a check that my bills are ACTUALLY not taking out so much, Im "pressed" because I think of have more spending money.
The outcome: Regardless how promising those things may seem...... it doesn't mean it will come through no matter how sure you are that it will.
Im not in charge... YOU aren't in charge... God is.

Now See What I See: Lose focus and look down, you'll get hurt. Look up and pay attention, your less vulnerable to be hurt and offended. Stamped.

Sincerely,
        LuvALeighD